My husband and I shut down the house, but on the way upstairs, the flood gates opened:
Me: "a plate of hashbrowns with oregano, lots of ketchup and salt!"
Hubby: "pardon?"
Me: "When I was younger, I'd put a slab of butter in the frying pan, then basically deep fry hashbrowns until they were golden brown with oregano. Then I'd sliiide them off the pan, in the round flat shape, right on to the plate and then put ketchup and lots of salt on."
Hubby: "What are you talking about? You'd feel horrible after you ate that!"
Me: "FRENCH FRIES WITH VINEGAR & KETCHUP"!
Hubby: "pardon?!"
(My fists clenched and shoulders tight and pulled up to my ears)
Me: "Oh jeez! BIG MAC MEAL!!"
(husband shaking his head)
This has happened a few times in my life. My sisters totally know what I am talking about. When I was a kid, when I got hungry, I'd get incredibly anxious and natter and shout out food that I wanted, how I wanted it prepared. It would overtake my mind and my entire train of thought was one dish of food to the next. It is unusual. I think it is along the lines of me swearing when I get embarassed, a few of my friends can attest to that from a Pussycat Dolls Dance class last year. If you know me, I'm usually quite composed and calm, and not a person of many words... Not sure if these two things are connected but they don't happen that often.
We were brushing our teeth when I think Hubby realized something out of the ordinary was going on. "French fries and gravy from the school cafeteria, shreddies with cheese, PACHOS & CHICKEN LIPS! (my body convulsing), Subway BLT, BANNOCK* dipped in butter !" (*Native Canadian origin, deep fried bread)
 | |
| These are Pachos, deep fried lattice fries, melted cheddar cheese, a touch of steak salt, and green onions, and dipped in Emerald Isle sauce. My favourite junk food EVER. |
There we lay in bed, me mumbling about foods. Hubby occassionally asking what certain foods were and then eagerly, I'd get to explain how the food was made or what it was. He tried to tell me how horrible I'd feel after I ate whatever it was. Didn't matter. The dishes just kept tumbling out of my mouth as if I said them would allow me just a taste.
He tried to change the topic. He started talking about travel. My mind when to favourite dishes I'd eaten through the world, the "ISHI YAKI 'BURI BOP'" bowl at Morimoto's in Mexico City, the pizza at The Dromedario in Portugal, the Japanese food at my friends' wife's family restaurant in Tokyo...
Hubby mentioned something about Fiji and somewhere else. I don't think I even heard what he said.
Me: "I wonder what they eat there..."
Hubby: "PACHOS! They actually have a pacho on their national flag."
Me: "yes, and they wear pacho hats on their head for their national celebrations"
Hubby: "You know... you're really not good at cleansing..."
Me: "No, I'm not"
He helped me get out of my cycle. That is big because he is on a cleanse/program too, so he could have been really frustrated with me, but he wasn't.
I was aching, but soooo happy I could go to sleep and dream of eating ANYTHING I WANTED. Sweet dreams!
Today is a new day. This morning, I registered for a "Raw Food On The Go" class this Wednesday. I am direly in need of recipes. I also am aware that I need to be eating more. Yesterday's busy schedule and lack of planning was a large contribution to my losing control.
I'm feeling better today. Back in control. Had my juice: apple, carrot, strawberry, celery, kale, spinach. Had some brown rice and seaweed. Going to go workout!
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