Monday 28 May 2012

Nicaragua - Day 16 - Ouch.

Feeling a little helpless these days with regards to K and Billie.  Moments throughout the day, I wonder how Billie is responding to treatments, and how K is carrying the weight of everything on her shoulders, so I send love and strength and prayers for rest and healing...  (big breath)

It feels insignificant to post, but I will, because these were already written, and there is a greater cause for these posts as well.  As silly as this days' post is relative to what is going on in life now, it eventually led to an inspiration that hopefully will come to fruition.  So I will continue:
 
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After two days of avoiding the sun, I hunkered down, whited up "Herbie" and my face, and out me and Chica Boom went in the golf-cart.  We were chargin' it!  Yihooo!

Got to the beach, paddled out to the break.  Put our wave hunter eyes on and started chasing waves.  It felt so good to be back in the water - things were really positive. We jockied around for a bit, shifting with the occasional big ol' sets that came in and the more frequent inside sets.

The session started out great.  There we were - good vibes, just doing our thing.  Caught a good 'left'...

Then came an 'outside' set - a bigger set of waves.  I went through the wave, but lost hold of my board.  I was fine as I knew no one was around.  I relaxed underwater, and when I came out the other side of the wave, I surfaced 'ready' to protect myself from the potential of my board coming back at me with the bigger winds.  I couldn't see it beyond the backside curl of the broken wave.  Then "CRACK!" my left upper shin exploded with a white cold pain that stole my breath.  My board had submerged about three feet, and like a gigantic elastic band via my leash on my ankle, it shot back at me when the wave that took it passed.  I took a big breath of air and breathed it out.  I didn't have time to look at my leg and I didn't really want to either which is always funny when I do that - like a little kid "if I don't see it, it didn't happen!".  I hopped back on my board and tried to build enough speed to get through the next on-coming wave to just get somewhere I could asses things (I couldn't accurately feel my lower leg through the searing pain), but my body was telling me I was heading the wrong way. 


Back right in the impact zone, under I went again.  Leg was not so good, the bone was just throbbing, but I could still kick my leg, which meant it probably wasn't broken.  Popped up and finally took a look at it.  Blood pooled out of my shin, about two inches below the head of the tibia.  I could see the white of my tibia shifting around inside the gash in my leg.   I swore a bit, and my heart sunk - a cut like this means stitches which means I would be out of the water the rest of the trip.  I was RIGHT where the waves were breaking so it was time to move and paddle in.

Chica was a ways away, "I gotta go in" I yelled out to her.  She kept paddling out encouraging me to get back out there - she didn't know what had happened.  "no, I gotta go in, I cut my leg".  To the beach Chica paddled with me.

We got to the beach, blood running down my leg, a round hole where you know it is cut deep enough that it's not just skin.  SO choked.  I don't even know for sure if it was the skeg/fin, or if it was just blunt force from the tail of my board.  It moved so fast and hard, hitting my shin dead on stopped the board from moving further and bounced it back enough to surface about a foot away from me.

Chica's friends, Ali and Kate were walking the beach and saw what was going on.  We got up to Chica's golf cart and headed back to the boys.  Kate is a pharmacist.  She is awesome.  She and Chica were STOCKED with supplies!  Kate supplied us with iodine to rinse and some gauze to wrap it up with.  I took a shower and got ready to head to the clinic.  Not amused, but it looked pretty tidy under her dressing.

Hubby drove me in to the local clinic 15-20 minutes away.  It reminded me of when I was in labour - he drove a lot faster than normal.  There are people along the dirt roads, a herd of cows.  "Uh, slow down, Hon".  My leg wasn't that bad, not like an emergency or anything.  Kinda makes me chuckle.

The Roberto Clemente Health Clinic is approximately 1,200 square feet, about 5 exam rooms (one room most likely taken up by Dr Flores who stays there over night, on-call), a waiting room and a small "pharmacy" in the back.  The waiting room was PACKED.  A knot grew in my stomach thinking the wait would be a few hours.   A lovely woman and her daughter gave me their seat. oi.  Not used to being the one to take others' seats - much appreciated.  A man with a white coat and glasses, Dr. Flores, opened the door from an exam room, saw us and scooped us in.  ?? 

Dr. Flores and Nurse Martha, were my team.  They undid the dressing and took a look at my gash.  "ohh-hh!" Dr. Flores said in that two-toned way that says he was intrigued, but needing a closer look.  They froze it up, hubby snapping photos, wincing at the needle going deep under the skin.   After feeling around inside the gash, he determined my muscle was in tact, but the facia was torn.  Dr. Flores was showing hubby what was what, until Hub let the doc know he was all good ('I trust you...').  He took a peek, but then I told him to sit down. 

Dislike that feeling of hard tugging on numb tissue, but it is a much better feeling than being stitched where the numbing meds haven't reached ...which is still easier than giving birth for the first time naturally and tearing (not to say giving birth naturally is a negative experience at all - if there were a choice, I'd do it the same again and again, but it does put "pain" in to perspective, and makes it easier to manage pain down the line).

There are about 5-7 stitches internally.  Then they moved on to the skin itself.  When they finished, I sat up and took a look.  "Huh..." I thought.  There it was, my new huge Frankenstein stitches along the ridge of my shin.  ha ha!  My mom's name for me growing up was "The Great Skinless Wonder", so this shin hack is just one of many, though the biggest of all I've collected.  Perhaps it is like a shin-lift, and blending of all the prior scars I had.  Hubby notes, I never was aspiring to be a shin model.

Both Martha and Dr. Flores were so gracious and kind.  They tried their best to chat with me, but thank goodness hubby has studied the Spanish he has.  sigh.  My knight in shining board shorts. Very grateful to Dr. Flores and Nurse Martha. 

Hubby went and collected the prescriptions of antibiotics, topical anti-inflammatory, painkiller and something else while I sat alone in the room.   Marta and Dr. Flores shared that they have seen many surfers here, with gashes to the face, sending them off to Rivas a few hours away, flying home on airplanes.  I am fine.  I can't surf or swim for the rest of our days here, and glad it wasn't at the start of the trip.


I think of what to tell my Little M when I get back because I know she is worried.  "I get to play on the beach all the time now!".  ...telling little ones the sunnier side is a part of being a parent.  But I also can't help but feel my heart break a bit too - "suck it up buttercup.  It could have been a lot worse".

I could have caught the board with my face.  Oh, I already did that last week.  ok.  If I just had my leg over 7" maybe it'd have sat me right back on it... or gotten me somewhere else... GULP!   It is what it is.  [As Life has a way of putting things in check, this now means nothing more than the drive to do more]

Our friends back at the casbah kept watch of Little M.  She seemed a little shy of seeing me, but we chatted about it later.  She just gave me tender kisses and told me "It's ok mom, we'll have another surf trip soon!".   She is my little sunshine.   Plus, so many good people around it just makes stuff like this not so bad.

ouch.  Power is out.  I'd like put some ice on Frankie, but also can't risk warming up all of this week's groceries in the fridge.  Throbbing, puffy.  wah, wah...    bummed.

It's just been such an odd trip.  Kinda feeling like something is keeping me out of the water.  I wait all year to do this - our family pays a lot (in a number of ways) to do trips such as this one.  You come and chase that reprieve, that 'undoing' that vacations seem to do that brings you closer to your centre and your loved ones even.  Not sure I get 'it'...

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