Results

The past week has been quite busy.  Work has definitely kept me busy in a positive way.  I met a great group of people and had some really good time performing and just having quiet moments.  Tuesday ended the run with a 16-hour work day that fell in to Wednesday, the day of my appointment to find out the results.

I was fortunate hubby wasn't working.  He came in with me, reconnecting with the doctor who delivered our daughter 3.5 years earlier.  The doctor reviewed that birth while we sat in front of his desk.  He continued on, asking how she was doing while I did my best to sit graciously and patiently.  I wanted to pounce on my chart and shake the results from the pages...  But I didn't.  I just sat quietly, trying to look all casual and like it was nothing.

He finally divided his attention to the left-hand side of his chart to the new results, scanned them and reported that all cell growth was within normal range - everything is fine.  My husband took my hand as my lungs finally exhaled.  My mind rewound his words a couple of times just to make sure I heard it right.

I had made a list of questions before we went in that I continued to ask, "what was done in the surgery? was there any thing out of the normal in the procedure?, will I need to increase the frequency of my PAP tests in the future?, is there anything to be diligent about in the future?"  He answered all of my questions and will continue to do a little more follow up, but everything at this point is FINE!

It has been a day since I found out; things not slowing down much life-wise.  I did another nutrition workshop Wednesday evening, had my mom over, did some work within my daughters' preschool today.  I find myself moving forward, sometimes still letting go of big breaths, releasing all that energy that was carried over the last month.  It is amazing how just a few words tumbling out of someone's mouth can change your path so profoundly.  My daughter and I just cuddle and hug and I get it.  My husband and I have been on another level.  I get it - how fortunate I am to be where I am, to be where we are.  It is a treasure.

The last month has been a cap to a really tough year.  One that has taught me exactly what I needed - life did bring me what I needed, when I needed to learn it.  It reinforced 'Needs' from 'Wants' in life, was an exercise in choosing where to put my energy and reminded me that my own "hero's journey" is not done, but just beginning again.  It was a call for increased physical wellness and awareness, it brought forward friends and family who were really amazing in a challenging time.  It meant the world - thank you for any and all of your positive thoughts.  I am looking forward to moving that positive energy forward.

With so very much appreciation...  Thank you.


By the way, as I was in the waiting room, I read a pamphlet about PAP tests and the current recommendations now do seem to be every two years.   A friend mentioned she was furious to hear that.  That was how long I went between PAP tests.  My doctor said she believed that what was going on with me has been happening over the past year.   I have learned over this course, that this really is something that surfaces for many women.  If I could have prevented it by going in earlier and having it treated in office, that'd have been ideal.  Perhaps it is a question for everyone to find out what feels right for them - one year between PAP tests, or two...?  It is food for thought for women.